BREAKING: Governor Abbott Trapped in Capitol Building

Austin, TX — Sources are telling Current Revolt that Texas Governor Greg Abbott has become trapped inside the capitol building where he has been working tirelessly for several days straight, trying to “flatten the curve” of the Covid-19 pandemic.

The Governor became trapped after rumors spread online by the far-right internet conspiracy movement “QAnon” that the the cure to Covid-19 was being kept from the public and that it was buried underneath the Capitol dome led to a mob of people trying to storm the Capitol. Large crowds of infected persons gathered around the building and attempted to break inside.

Unfortunately, 100% of the protestors succumb to the virus within hours and died where they stood, blocking all entrances and exits to the building with the Governor trapped inside.

The novel coronavirus variant 19 has killed 78 vigintillion Texans to date, with the worldwide number of dead reaching infinity.

Snopes is reporting that there is no cure buried beneath the Capitol dome.

Staff of Governor Abbott all escaped to safety within a few minutes, however, Governor Abbott’s wheelchair is unable to climb the towering stacks of dead bodies.

Medical professionals say the governor is safe from the virus, due to his diligence in always wearing his mask, even while bathing. Abbott is also said to have started emergency survival protocols and began drinking his own urine as soon as the protestors surrounded the building.

Tommy Oliver reporting.